listening ears

"Turn your listening ears on," is a phrase I often utter to small children. But you know what? That is easier said than done.

I think that as adults, most of us consider ourselves to be pretty self-disciplined. Lately, though, God is gently showing me my flaws while offering me the chance to embrace them.

One thing that most people find is important to a healthy prayer or meditation life is the ability to sit in silence and truly relax and/or listen for a while.

Today it became glaringly obvious that this is not necessarily one of my strong suits.

First of all, I have trouble sitting still without fidgeting. I am nearly always moving some part of my body.

Secondly, music is a HUGE part of my life. I'm almost always singing and pretty much always have a song in my head.

Thirdly, as mentioned in a previous entry, I'm a talker. I like to do it. I even talk back at the TV when watching (which is often quite amusing for others).

So imagine what it was like for me when God put me in a position today that brought up all of those challenges.

Today I managed a 15 minute drive in silence. I was transporting a child who was not feeling well and wanted to be quiet out of respect for her.

And...it was really hard. In the car I ALWAYS play music and sing along and/or talk to the person/people in the car with me. Not being able to do that, even for 15 minutes was a struggle. Silly, but true.

I even wound up cheating a little and humming to myself extremely quietly.

What is it about silence that makes us want to fill it? Are we afraid of what we'll here if we relinquish control for a moment and listen inwardly? Am I afraid of these things?

I guess this is just another facet of God teaching me to be a better listener, eh?